Writing romance, it’s easy to get caught up in the idea of grand gestures: Jewelry, serenades, love letters.
But the truth is this: Real romance is in the little things your loved one does to make your life a little sweeter.
Truth: Sometimes, I want to strangle my husband or spank the ever-loving sh*t out of him, and not in the kinky way. He drives me crazy, as I am sure I drive him crazy. The only reason neither of us is in a stripped jumpsuit behind bars is because the things we love about each other outweigh the things that make each of us stabby.
Truth: My life isn’t all sunshine and roses. But the sunny days outnumber the cloudy ones. Especially when my spouse makes me laugh.
Truth: My husband sometimes gets jealous of my fictional characters. But he’s also always willing to help me research the love scenes.
Fiction: You need money to be romantic. Please don’t think that all romance comes from expensive dinners and gifts. Putting the other person’s needs first is more romantic than any gift. You’ll find some everyday tips on romantic gestures at the bottom of this post. Keep reading.
Fiction: Sex isn’t as good as it is in the beginning of a relationship. No? Well then start experimenting. You have a partner you trust? Tell him/her your fantasies. You’d be surprised how many partners are excited by this idea. It’s a great way to reignite the passion.
Truth: I’m writing this post because my husband pissed me off yesterday. Last night, he got me to laugh by being a horny goofball, even though I was still pissed. Today, he called me at work to see how my day was going. When I asked him what he was doing, he told me he had just cleaned the house and was getting ready to go to the market to buy the ingredients to make paella. My immediate response, “Now that is real romance.” All was forgiven when I walked into my clean house and found the cheese, olives, and wine above waiting for me.
Real Romance for Everyday
- Take care of a chore that your partner loathes. Laundry, dishes, general house cleaning- whatever. If it’s something they always dread and complain about, do it for them, without having to be asked.
- Give your partner space. It’s not always about you or the two of you. Sometimes, we all just need a little alone time. Tell your partner to take a break. Offer up some quiet time for a nap or a bath. Take the kids out of the house. Give your partner time to relax.
- Make a meal. Check out Food Network for ideas or pull out a cookbook and make something amazing at home that isn’t on the regular weekly dinner menu. Lighting a couple of candles doesn’t hurt.
- Take care of your partner’s needs. Hopefully this is already happening. However, if you tend to rush through the motions on a race to the finish line, take your time and try some of the experimenting mentioned above. You’ll either come out of it with a new perspective and a new vigor or a really good laugh.
- Read to your partner. We all get caught up in watching TV and some of us get to go to the movies now and then. But reading aloud to your partner can be a truly intimate experience. Especially reading romance. I’ve been reading my summer romance, Sea Breeze, aloud to my husband, and he loves it. Feel free to pick up a copy of one of my books if you need a little sweet and spicy romance here.
Tell me, what everyday tasks equal romance to you?
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